Hi, name is Absynthe and I am America's Next Top Alcoholic. I pride myself on being the baddest bitch in the trailer park. I currently reside in Portland, Oregon, which is known for being weird and having the most strip clubs per capita in the nation. On my off time of being a sex symbol, I go by Dylan and work hard to pay the bills #minimumwageBarbie . So yeah, this is my blog, I post shit I like, byeeeeeeeeeeee.
loserpoet:

it’s a metaphor


My future husband

loserpoet:

it’s a metaphor

My future husband


thechristinastory:

That is the best reaction ever.


xv7:

sa-ni-ty:

What the fuck is this

a government secret

xv7:

sa-ni-ty:

What the fuck is this

a government secret


fukkkres:

when she ready for round two but you look down and ur meat like

image


phatticuss:

okay scary story time my sister hid this pic of Michael Jackson behind my pillow and when I lifted my pillow I saw this and I screamed so loud I can’t even handle looking at the pic omfg

phatticuss:

okay scary story time my sister hid this pic of Michael Jackson behind my pillow and when I lifted my pillow I saw this and I screamed so loud I can’t even handle looking at the pic omfg


lizthefangirl:

xibalbadance:

Mother fuckin’ Jim Carrey

i have searched

for this gifset

for all eternity


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